attn: women

Did you know that your body is like a lollipop and if you have sex you're just a "poorly wrapped, saliva-fouled sucker." Please, click the link for some more LOLz like how HIV/AIDS is contracted through skin contact (that one's for you, mom) and condoms cause cancer. Good luck, everybody, you're all gonna die. It was nice knowing you.

In other news, I'm freaking cold. Today was crazy windy and the coldest temps we've had so far. Also, I'm counting down the hours until Friday at 2:05. As the week goes on, sugar levels and anxious jumping up and down in the seats increases, meaning this week is going to be the best EVER. I already had some fun students that pushed my buttons today. One was jacked up on all sorts of sugar and caffeine and one tugged on my shirt like a 5 year old for a good 5 minutes before I told her to leave me alone.
But, next time you see me, give me a high five because I finished grading the first wave of research papers before break. WTG, me!

stupid buttons

If you got a random email from me about StumbleUpon, ignore it. I thought I hit the "do not send to friends" button, but apparently, the choices weren't "do not send" and "do send", but instead "send!" and "SEND!!". I don't know how it happened, but it did. Ridiculous.

two more weeks.

Yes, only two more weeks of school, then I get my break. It's only a week and a day, but I'm looking forward to it and will try to enjoy every second of it.
I'm trying very hard to not let it get in the way of my teaching, though. That's easy to do. The kids are thinking of it, we're thinking of it... it's easy to get lazy. I'm not going to get lazy, though. Mostly because I don't want to clean up the mess after lazy teaching and I don't want to be left with a lot to do during vacation and after. I think we have to submit grades before the break anyway, which will help motivate me.
This past Friday after school, Tye and I went out browsing in one of the Norfolk malls, contributed to Toys for Tots "Stuff the Bus" (upped our good karma!), went out to dinner and went to see Granby's production of "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown". It was so good! The kids did great, of course. The set was fantastic, it was hilarious and I didn't have one negative thing to say (besides something they couldn't control: how incredibly tired I was). I had a great time with Tye and I think we agreed we should do it again. Now I understand why so many teachers go out on Fridays--it's definitely better than going home and thinking about how tired you are and everything that could've gone better during the week!
I think getting closer to going back to Michigan has brought up a lot of things I don't want to think about. We're still transitioning between these two worlds of our past and our present, and going back brings up all this... stuff (yes, I know- very articulate, but there's really no other way of categorizing it). I find myself slightly nervous and anxious about going back, and that bleeds over when I think of everything here compared to there. Ugh. It's hard to explain. I think maybe it's a feeling that my nostalgia will always leave me feeling disappointed when I go back. Things will never be the same when I'm there and part of me won't accept that, which leads to a small spot of sadness and disappointment. Most of it is way too silly, over-dramatic and personal to bring up on this blog. It'll pass once the holiday season is over.
One thing I do like about this holiday season is that we're driving and not flying. Driving is cheaper, more environmentally friendly (surprisingly), and a whole lot less stressful! Plus, I've already gotten a lot of holiday shopping done. I have to just wait for it to show up on my doorstep, wrap it and/or put everything together. I keep thinking I have to do all that now, now, now! because I'm so used to doing everything closer to Christmas. This year, there's really no rush! Amazing. Why didn't I do this before?

he's that... thing.

A: "He's not the smartest crayon in the box."
D: "Don't you mean... sharpest crayon?"
A: "No, it's supposed to be brightest."

Drrrrr. Yes, this actually happened. We laughed like mad after we realized how incredibly silly it all was. With David's brain fried from school and mine fried from the A day (the day where I get 4 classes!), not only was it a ridiculous exchange, but also made it even more funny than normal.


BTW, it's cold. It was in the 30s this morning when I went to school. I know that near the end of summer I really wanted to be able to wear long sleeves and fall clothes. Now, I've been so used to being comfortable without having to put on a scarf and a jacket. I don't mind the cold too much, but I really hate the same thing I've always hated about winter: getting up in the morning (I don't want to leave the warm bed!), having to change clothes (but it's cold and these clothes are already warm!), and having to get out of the shower (it's freezing! and my wet hair will make me even colder!!).


Today, my 11th graders picked their independent novel. A lot of them jumped at the chance to read 1984 after I described the storyline, called it one of the few books I really enjoyed reading in high school, and one of the kids that's well respected in the class said "I'm reading it right now and it's AWESOME". Hopefully they enjoy it as much as I did.

gigantic snowflakes are the new black

We went to our first holiday party last night. The theme was ugly/tacky holiday sweaters. I found this gem:

I know, I know. Please try to hold back your feelings of jealousy and envy.
That thing was about 5 extra pounds of stretched out fabric and shoulder pads.
The get together was lots of fun. We exchanged white elephant gifts, feasted on delicious cookies and other treats, and enjoyed cranberry slush and hot apple cider. We managed to give away our "For Him Only" and "For Her Only" books. Hopefully Danielle and Geoff can find another couple to pass along those brilliant books to help save their marriage from the crazy, insecure women that always ruin relationships. Thank goodness for getting rid of those two books. We ended up getting a Christmas tree coat hanger? Stocking hanger? Whatever it is, I think we accidentally left it at the Kaufman's.

Today I finished up reading some research paper rough drafts, graded letters to the editor, put in grades, and had a brilliant idea of what to do with my 11th graders to help them finish off their sources and body paragraphs. It was very productive.
Then, I turned on some Christmas/Holiday music and dragged out all our Christmas decorations. Here is our mini-tree, filled to the brim with ornaments.

I also put up a garland across the entrance to the kitchen and some lights (the only strand left that works! How did that happen?) across the sliding door. Way to go, me! I am patting myself on the back as I type this.

Of course, once the tree is out, the cats have to investigate. Jackie was hiding behind the tree trying to act like she wasn't going to attack an ornament once my back was turned.

She was laying in the back, eyeing that moose. She never attacked it, but she did attack many of the smaller, rounder, easier to remove ornaments.

Silly kitty.