been one of those weeks...

This week has had amazing days and incredibly irritating days. Today, the amount of grading I have to do, whining I had to listen to about projects and essays and tests, and the amount I feel I haven't accomplished really weighed heavy on me. I had a few moments where I asked myself, "Really? I wanted to be a teacher?". I put so much pressure on myself to accomplish so much and do so much, and always feel like I could do more, that it ends up with days like this. Today, I had to completely reorganize everything on my desk and accomplish small tasks to stop freaking out during my plan period at the end of the day. It worked, though. I'm feeling a lot better and I'm hanging in there-- especially because this weekend is a three day weekend. Phew. Stuff will get done, and I know that, I just allowed myself to get overwhelmed and to give in to all the pressure I put on myself to do a good job.

One thing I've been thinking a lot about this week is the difference between urban and rural schools. Some of the problems and irritations are the same, which makes sense. No matter what, you are teaching teenagers. But there are some differences. I really miss teaching in an more urban school. I don't really know why, and I can't quite put my finger on it, but I think it comes down to that that environment is what I'm used to, it's what I know, it's what I love, and the rural school just can't quite make it to that level. I have a real love/hate relationship with the rural school I teach at. Some things are great, other things about it are completely mind-boggling and infuriating. Maybe that will change, but as of right now, I don't see that happening.